Do you usually feel drained out of energy after putting your baby to bed for the night? Do you ask yourself what you have done all day? You have fed her breakfast, you did laundry, then the baby had her first nap. Afterward, you strolled to the grocery store, had lunch, clean-up after lunch, afternoon nap, indoor playing and then getting dinner ready. Your husband walks through the door tired from a day’s work, and you suddenly relax a little.
You did nothing new or exceptional. Then why do you feel so tired and frustrated?
Let me tell you. Being a stay-at-home mom is incredibly demanding. You sacrifice yourself little by little, pushing your limits every day. You do this in the hope you teach your kid how to become a balanced successful emotionally intelligent adult because this is what you read every day on parenting blogs.
How to leave behind the constant fatigue? Let me show you 5 insanely easy ways to improve your daily life as a mother or carer.
1. Vent and find solutions
Venting instead of bottling your emotions is always healthy when feeling overwhelmed. Vent to your friends, mother, other mothers on forums and to your husband, if possible.
Don’t fall in the complaining trap though. Once you’ve got your feelings out, consider enlisting the help of close friends or relatives. Ask your mom to watch the baby for two hours a week or ask other mothers what solutions they have found. Find a trustworthy teenager in the neighboorhood to babysit while you go out for brunch with your husband on Saturday.
Start making small changes to your daily routine and stop feeling guilty for needing alone time now and then.
2. Take care of yourself
Start by taking care of you, even if it’s only the little things. Clean your teeth as soon as you get of out bed, also if that means your baby will be waiting impatiently in the bathtub. Take a shower if you feel brave enough.
Brush your hair when you get of out the house, even if you fear your baby will start pulling at it. Just have her sit on the floor for 3 seconds. You deserve it.
Read a book for 20 minutes during baby’s nap. Consider going shopping or getting a pedicure when your husband is at home. You will feel refreshed.
3. Increase your physical activity
You may now be wondering: “How can I exercise when I can’t even use the toilet undisturbed?” Getting more exercise does not mean squeezing in one full hour for working out in your already hectic schedule. Working out every day is not easy. But you can do it if you make it a priority.
A practical exercise you can do at home is called the Thirty-second Plank. The plank is considered one of the best ways to improve your posture and build your waistline. And it only takes away thirty seconds of your time. Try waking up 10 minutes earlier each day, exercise for thirty seconds and have a short shower.
Besides the obvious benefit that it is fabulous for your body and mind, one essential advantage is that it will help your child develop a healthy attitude about exercising.
4. Sleep, sleep, sleep
Forget about cleaning up the kitchen when the baby takes a nap. Take a siesta yourself.
Go earlier to bed in the evening.
And most importantly, have your baby in bed early enough. If she is used to staying up late, consider starting bedtime routine 15 minutes earlier each day. Be sure to gradually reduce stimuli throughout the evening and as much as possible when putting her to bed for the night.
5. Encourage your baby to play by herself
One reason why mothers or carers are exhausted and frustrated is that they feel compelled to entertain the little ones continually. Inventing new games, singing songs, buying new flashy toys, giving the baby the telephone to watch a short video, is all part of the strategy.
But do babies really need 100% of our attention all the time? Not really. Everything is new to them, that is why is it unlikely for babies to get bored. It is OK to let her play by herself (but under adult supervision) when you are too tired, in fact, self-directed play is even recommended.
A famous quote from infant specialist Magda Gerber is “My attitude has always been: Wait, Wait, Wait.” Being an engaged observer and acknowledging baby’s efforts and achievements is usually what infants really need. Stepping in to help the baby with something she is struggling with or to keep her entertained is often unnecessary.
What should you do if she has already got used to having you as her favorite playmate?
Limit your involvement in her play step by step. Instead of finishing that three-piece puzzle for her, talk to her about her play and point her achievements.
Be fully present at crucial moments: changing diapers, nap, meals, bathing, bedtime and waking up routines.
6. Let playing get messy
Babies have an innate passion for exploring as this is how they learn. Let your baby dig in the dirt, color herself up with water wipe pens and play with food. It will keep her busy, and you can have a short break.
An easy but messy way to keep her occupied while you’re preparing lunch or dinner is to let her explore the kitchen. This involves playing with your shiny kitchen utensils, plastic, and wooden bowls, colander, whisk and so much more.
Tips: offer objects gradually, spice it up by giving her the cereal box, a small glass of milk or some flour. Closely supervise her so that she does not accidentally swallow something.
Don’t try to be perfect
Running a household and having fun with your baby can be quite tiring. But the truth is you don’t need to be a supermom. Your baby solely wants you, not to have the house in perfect order. She needs you to laugh with her and to understand her.
When children feel you are emotionally available for them, they also cooperate better.
P.S. Have you ever felt overwhelmed by household and baby duties? If yes, share with us what worked for you.
