In a 2014 study published in the Journal of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics, researchers have found that children with well-established bedtime routines have higher than average social and emotional skills. By knowing their schedule ahead, children should not feel anxious about what comes next and, in turn, can focus on learning new things. This creates the grounds for superior school performance.
For instance, bedtime routines such as storytelling, singing, and reading, play a decisive role in developing skills necessary for thriving at school.
Why parents should offer structure:
1. Strong time management and attention skills as adults
According to a 2016 study coordinated by Dr. Malatras at the University of Albany, people who grow up with daily routines are likely to be highly focused persons and have improved time management skills.
Consistent routines foster self-discipline, thus playing a crucial role in developing our ability to pursue our goals as adults consistently. By teaching children about self-control, predictable schedules are crucial for improving perseverance and keeping motivation high.
How do routines teach self-discipline? It’s simple. By performing various daily tasks repetitively, children know what comes next and learn concepts like “before” and “after”.
For routines to be beneficial, make sure you allow small children to perform tasks at their own pace. Patiently explain the role of different items required for carrying out an activity and the steps to follow. Consider it an excellent opportunity for language development and for strengthening your relationship.
2. Children cooperate better when they know what is expected of them.
Young children develop a sense of satisfaction when they are able to perform a routine task. Your toddler’s face will beam with delight as he throws his dirty nappy in the garbage. He may proudly look at you after putting his dirty T-shirt in the washing machine.
Children enjoy taking the lead in daily chores. This is an excellent opportunity to teach them about house responsibilities and self-grooming. Washing the dishes after breakfast, cleaning up the table after lunch, getting dressed in the morning, and washing teeth are all examples of healthy habits. When your toddler participates willingly in daily routines, the risk of power struggles lowers. Moreover, their self-esteem will rise as they get better at carrying out daily chores.
3. Structure and stability in stressful times
A consistent daily schedule has positive effects on children with recent stressful experiences such as family relocation, divorce or the death of one of the parents. In such difficult and confusing situations, structure and stability are crucial. Children need to see that their daily carer is dependable.
4. Family bonding
Routines also imply regular family activities, like going to the playground on Wednesday, having breakfast together in the weekend and going hiking once a month.
Though your child may be young, he or she will sense the importance of family habits and will start to share your values and beliefs, such as the importance of having a united family or the health benefits of regular outdoor activities.
Even if you would rather watch TV from your sofa on Sunday, try to be a role model for your kid and pick some fun outdoor activities that you all enjoy.
Teach your child the importance of a healthy family meal. You do not need to have broccoli for dinner every evening to make a point. But you can teach your kids to eat slowly and without the TV on. You can even make it a habit of cooking simple recipes for breakfast together each Saturday.
5. More “me” time for parents
How often do you go to bed unshowered and somewhat hungry? How often do you crave for 5 minutes of alone time?
Settling your child into a daily routine will not automatically offer you one full hour for exercising and another one for your pedicure. But as your kid becomes better at performing everyday tasks, your relaxation time will increase. Shorter bedtime routines mean “me” time in the evening. Getting ready fast for daycare equals time for coffee. Focusing on you for 10 minutes makes you more responsive and fun.
Pleasant activities that fit in a 5-10 minute break:
- drinking a cup of coffee
- venting with your friend over the phone
- doing the 30-second plank exercise
- breathing slowly for 5 minutes
- playing with your dog
- reading a chapter from that book that you have been reading for two months
- listening to music on your phone (hit shuffle otherwise you will end up wasting time deciding on what song to listen)
- listening to a TED talk.
How to avoid a rigid schedule
Being “creatures of habit” may be dull and kill creativity, so ensure your child has time for independent play. Take a day off from time to time, and enjoy yourselves without planning the schedule ahead.
Rules need to be broken sometimes. Whenever there is an exciting thing going on, like 4th of July fireworks, the first snow of the year, or a full solar eclipse, there is no reason why you shouldn’t shake things up a little. After all, the purpose of routines is to make life easier, not complicated.
Planning ahead too much and being stuck in routines can make you resistant to change.
Too much routine can make you feel stuck, and your children bored while a disorganized schedule leads to frustration and crankiness.
You need to find what works best, a middle ground which is different for each family.
What about you? What works best for your family? Share your thoughts with us so we canlearn from each other.
